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The New Yarn beginning....will you be a part of it?

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Ok, blogging, praying friends, You have been praying for this "new big thing" I've been talking about. ( I know you have, because it is coming together...I'm doing it scared!) God has added a new Yarn to our story....

I have been called to start a Social Enterprise ( didn't even know it had a name when I had the idea, but it does!) If you dont know what that is yet - check out the video below for an explanation. What is a social enterprise? My goal is to provide practical hope and help for Women who are spouses of inmates. I would be providing packages of information, resources, and personal support for things that are both common to all who go through this life experience and individualized to each woman's situation. Things like how to save money on those outrageous collect calls, How to navigate two worlds at once, Why do I feel like I'm the one in prison, How can I help my Spouse while he's gone, How to be a single mom - when I'm not single.... …

This new habit is promising!

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I have been focusing on creating good habits lately, even before the new year started, and one of those habits I am very grateful I started building is to journal my morning devotions. I get up before anyone else in the morning (despite the fact I am not a morning person at all). I read - currently Matthew Henry's Commentary with scripture included - and write down what stood out to me and what is relevent to me in particular that day. I also write my prayer in response to what I have learned. In doing this, and using my focus word for the year, I was inspired to add another new habit.  Reflection Journaling
Now, I don't know if this is a thing, if it's called reflection journaling anywhere else, but this is what I came up with. Every evening I reflect back on the day and ask myself 5 questions about the choices I made that day. I am looking to be able to see where I need to grow, how I can do that, and also have a record of progress for those days that I just feel like n…

What NOT to be this year - and every year

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We hear a lot about what we are aiming for in the new year, but do we consider what NOT to be? I think we need to focus not only on what we want to do or become in the new year, but more, replace something we don't want anymore with good!

Last week we talked about my word for the year. which is LISTEN, and why I find it important to my life and my family. If you read that post, you will recall I mentioned that this year I have a
"Not word"  What is that? So glad you asked!

One of the Facebook private groups I am a part of is for wives who have experienced infidelity, and it is full of some of my favorite people. Jodi Utter, who started the group and runs it beautifully, challenged us to have a Not Word as well as an inspiring word for this year. A Not Word is to remind us of something we need to stop (a bad habit etc.) or something we refuse to keep doing or being this year. My Not Word is the balance to my Inspiring Word. I refuse to beDEFENSIVEthis year.
I have a major…

Do you Have an Inspiring Word for 2020?

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I heard about this whole "One Word" thing, where you pick your one Inspiring Focus Word for the new year, a couple years ago. First year, I didn't pick one in advance, but discovered what it needed to be as I went. That year it was BALANCE. I continued with that word last year too, as it still applied and I needed to work on it in more areas.  This year I have chosen a new inspiring word. One I have recently noticed I really need to focus on. My word for 2020 is LISTEN.

Why LISTEN? I'll tell you. I have been learning a lot about communication this year especially, since it is the first time we have had hubby home after prison for a full year and no worries about him leaving any time soon. I learned quite a bit about communicating concisely when he was in prison, with 15 minute phone calls, that was a necessity! Now I am learning how to communicate better in more "normal" circumstances. It requires a whole lot less talking than you might think! 
Listening i…

A Prison Wife's Unseen Grief

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Being a prison wife is a world apart. It cannot be understood by anyone outside of that world. It is sometimes like being a widow, but not. It can even feel like it would be easier to be a widow in the long run. However,  I have learned from talking to friends who have been widowed suddenly that is not really easier either way, just different. It sometimes is like being divorced, but not. Most of the time it is just plain confusing, and  full of pain and the unknown.

Being a widow, you are expected to grieve, to take time and be sad and go through a grieving process, same with divorce to a different degree. And people generally understand, or at least can be compassionate for how you are feeling. These things are a part of life, and most people know at least something about how to help you or even what kinds of feelings you are going through. 
Being a prison wife, now that is one that no-one other than another prison wife gets at all. There isn’t a phone tree to organize bringing you…

Empowering Beliefs: How to thrive, not just survive

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Do you want to know how in the world you are going to survive this crazy, no-one gets it life of a prison wife? I'm proof it can be done, but...
How about thriving instead of just surviving!?

Becoming your best you and developing great character traits, that is the core of what determines how you will weather this season in your life. Are you ready to thrive!?

I have been through years of counseling and have learned some very valuable lessons. One is that there is a natural flow to how things work, and your character development is no different. You may think that your character is set in stone now that you are an adult, that there is no teaching old dogs new tricks.
 In my experience, however, you can absolutely retrain yourself ( or allow yourself to be retrained) and redirect your entire life! It starts with the things you tell yourself are true. Taking the time you have now, time that you are suddenly alone again, to improve yourself can only make his homecoming, and how you b…

Social media's effects on teens

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Social media's effects on teens You may be wondering why I am addressing this on a prison wife blog. Social media was a part of what led us to this life! It is a place where people can easily hide who they really are, and what their agenda is. I learned real fast that my boys needed to understand the dangers and respect the rules, that those rules truly are for their protection. Rules like don't give out personal information, and always be your true self. They need to be protected not only from some of the people on the other side of the computer, but from themselves as well.  
Social media has become an integral part of our everyday lives. Parents use it, just like their children. However, on average, teenagers are the ones who spend the most time on  Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, and similar platforms. So, what are social media’s effects on our teens?
Many parents are concerned about this. Some are afraid that this habit will grow into an addiction, while others a…

Peaceful Spirit, Powerful self: How to conquer negativity in trying times

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Difficulties can be seen as an opportunity...

to exercise my focus and determination, to
strengthen my faith and show me where I need to grow. The most effective thing I have found
during trying times is when I concentrate on maintaining a peaceful spirit.
Calming my self through praying, remembering scripture and reminding myself of God's
provisions for me in the past helps me to conquer the challenges that face me and continue
“considering it Joy when I encounter various trials"
(James 1:2)

I do my best to avoid being reactive to difficult situations that catch me off guard. I have built
up a habit of stepping back and taking a breath before I respond. It is always better to calmly
and thoughtfully respond than react without thinking. While it is easy to allow confrontation to
anger me or tell me I'm not worthy, I choose to bring peace to the situation and not let my
emotions take over.
I spend intentional time on nurturing my mind and spirit through music, scripture memoriza…